What should I be Doing (piecing 6)

[Zues126]

Thanks for the response Rose.

I spoke with my mom about this at dinner the other night. We both agreed that once you have children and are a single parent you definitely have made a commitment to take care of those children and you can't usurp that because you want more in your own life.

It would be a problem if she put another man in front of her child in a way that negatively impacted him.

It is another problem if she uses having a son as an excuse to not commit wholeheartedly to the marriage and making her husband the center of her world as well. My mom (who is a feminist with a PHD) said "people that say the kids have to come first are making excuses because they don't want to put what's needed into the relationship".

Her conclusion was that any talk of putting one love in front of another was kind of disturbing to her, the same way as it would be to say you loved one kid more than another. She feels you have to honor your love and commitment to both, and that anytime you prioritize it doesn't play out well. Just wanted to clarify that when I said I am against 'putting the kids first' I am not necessarily for putting them last either. I just happen to agree that it's a bad path to follow.

I like your posts Rose, thank you for sharing.