Detachment, anxiety and the end of limbo 2

[Phoebe]

I'm right there with you, Sotto. My other house has a lot of very strongly negative experiences associated with it, and there is exactly the issue you describe - awful little land mines just waiting to be stepped on to trigger all kinds of pain. I wish I knew a single person in the entire state where the other house is who could check in on it for me, but I just don't. If I don't check on it, then that leaves only WH, and let's just say he is unreliable in his current state of limerence. Never mind that the last contact I had with him was easily 7 weeks ago.

So my new L friend said that he could go with me, but it will have to be in a few weeks. It will be good to have another person with me, but I plan on staying overnight at least one night and possibly two. We're not dating and have known each other for 5 weeks now. Awkward, much? These are the situations where putting all of your eggs in one basket (WH, in my case) can come back to bite you. I was so rarely at the other house that I never had the opportunity to meet anyone out there.

And at my farm, I know a number of people, but none are able to go with me, as either age or health precludes their helping. That leaves my parents (who won't go) or my brand new friends. It's a lot to ask of a new person. Luckily my L friend is moving himself very soon, so I arranged to help him in exchange for him helping me.

I was busy all day long today. I went ice skating with a friend and am definitely getting stronger and my muscle memory is coming back. We talked outside on a park bench for quite a while and that was nice, too. I grabbed z bit of food and then went to see my therapist. Again!!! It's my third appointment this week and my 7th visit in 4 weeks. It's just been a more difficult stretch again, and it's been good to be able to talk about it with someone who isn't judging, pushing, etc.

I had enough time after the T visit to drive home, take care of my critters and then pick up my mother for our 'big' Thursday night social. We did our usual fro wry shopping, meeting, then thrift store shopping. I dropped her at home and went back to the farm, by which point it was after 9:30, barely light, and a perfect night to walk my fiends again.

If there is one thing more magical than fireflies in the fields, it is fireflies over head in the branches of a hundred year old apple tree. What a beautiful thing to see.

I'm super tired, so it's time to call it a day. Sleep well, everyone!