Have to keep making the changes

[ATPeace]

Thank you

So I do not post here so often I found it was starting to overwhelm me however I am finding that with each day that pass I am getting just that little bit stronger

It is funny how when I look back at some of the advice that I have been given I can see how blinkered I have been

I have been trying to fix something that I have no control over in fact it is funny when I first came here I thought that I had a better chance than some at turning this around

I now realise just how unhappy she had been for not months we are talking years and years I understand things that I thought was easy to repair is hopeless

When a person tells you they wish they had left years ago and yet right up to bomb date she was telling me she loved me ...I believe she lost her love and I just did not realise it ....I am seeing things clearer and everything that I have done over the years has let her feeling upset nothing I ever did was ever good enough it's all bullshit

So from next week I start at the fitness trainer 5 days a week it's time to put in the effort

I really am not looking forward to selling and relocating everything of mine skipping things then down sizing living apart from my life long friend and partner but I will be ok I know I will be ok it has to be done

I have been so low and now I have to think of me

Will update again soon but. Thank you for sticking with me my friends

Ghost

So