Yeah, I know it against DB principles to say ILY, and we all say we slipped when we say it, but I think there are contexts in which it is ok, I think there are ways of saying it which change the impact. For example, there's a huge difference between a whiny begging hurting focused on the spouse ILY, and a confident complimentary subliminally slipped into the stream of conversation ILY.
I try to avoid saying ILY, but I've slipped several times, and I've also found myself hedging the phrase or saying it in other ways instead...
When something about her really shines, I'll say... "I love that about you."
In reply to her asking whether I am angry at her about what she's doing... "No, I'm not angry, I've told you already how I feel about you." (a few times, when pressed to say how I feel, an ILY has slipped out as part of my explanation)
