Chapter 3. Let the detachment begin

[bigybiz]

Doodler:

You hit the nail on the head. The more I try and distance/detach myself - it seems I get more addicted/obsessed.

The typical Rx of distraction/GAL makes sense. I think my GAL is of epic proportions. My long time followers have seen my GAL - its almost overboard. One or two of us have wondered if it is just me trying to be busy. Not growing, healing, etc.

Bigybiz 2.0 projects, catching up with friends, making new friends, learning how to cook and bake, gardening, I bought a motorcycle, decluttering, my fitness is off the charts (I run 5 k a day, plus dumbell exercises), I straightened my hair, bought some new clothes, etc, etc.

I'm the primary care giver of the kids and I run the house on my own. I get up at 5:30ish and when I get into bed around 12m, I'm bushed.

I've not had the focus to put my energy into my business - but I'm hopping that is coming. So my business is putting along.

I just can't seem to shake her and my desire to "fix" my MR. I look for practical steps/ideas that can fuel my detachment. I pray to be cured of this addiction.

The two recent nuggets of information that have helped me change my paradigm a little are:

From Zues16 - How can I expect my W to quit her addiction to her passion/work/community/fame seeking, etc if I can't quit her

From my Pastor - MY GAL is fine - but if I'm doing things and hoping to get a reaction (i.e. doing what works). I should be careful that it could be perceived as trying to be controlling.

So the GAL, distraction is underway. I need to refine my LRT. I just need to shake her. A trusted adviser told me I should date a little. Just to see what female company is like in 2016. I'm not so sure about that.

Her not being her is a big help.

I'll keep on the GAL - I just need a little something more.