Five Years Ago Today

[tadpole1025]

Hi everyone. Just a quick update on me. I know I don't get many responses anymore because most who have followed my story from the beginning have moved on and don't really post much anymore. I've been at this for 5 1/2 years....and hope to move on soon too.

I'm in my new place.....just me.

To be honest, I hated it at first. It is the first time I've EVER lived by myself.

Now that things have settled down, I'm starting to enjoy it except for the fact that money is really, really tight. And, I do get pretty lonely sometimes...very lonely.

I have noticed though, that I've had a few bad days recently. It seems like now that I'm on my own, I seem to think about XW a little more and even MISS her and the times that we had. It all seems like so long ago...a different lifetime entirely. It's like a movie that I starred in many years ago that nobody watches anymore. So many memories and good times all locked in the farthest reaches of my mind that like to peak out from time to time whether I want them to or not. They are there and I'm afraid they always will be. I look back and sometimes it is hard to believe that that was my life. Our life. And, it's gone. She'll never, ever be a part of my life again and I'll never be a part of hers. She is a different person and has a different life now. It is sad to think of it like that, but it is what it is. She has erased me, but I can't seem to erase her. I don't like it. I don't like it at all. Hopefully, that will fade with time. I hope so.

A friend at work gave a really nice camera to me. Hopefully, in a few weeks, after I learn how to use it, I'm going to get out play around with it and take some animal pictures. Maybe they'll be good enough to post on FB.

My lady friend at work is still just that...a friend. We do have a pretty cool friendship. I am not dating and am not really looking for anyone to date. My sons have recently stated that I need to get out and meet someone but....I'm not really interested. If it happens, it happens.

There was a poster on here a few years back that went by the name of Seekinganswers. (I think.) Does anyone know whatever happened to her?

That is all for now. I hope to start a brand new thread soon.

Thanks for reading.

Tad