How do you not care for her feelings whilst validating?
Two different things here, I think.
On the one hand, you do want to understand her feelings. You want to validate them. You can accept and acknowledge her anger, her sadness, her fears, etc.
On the other hand, you cant let her feelings dictate your actions. Dont do something because you think it will cause anger or sadness or fear. You have to live your life without worrying too much about how she might feel or react.
