I'm not faking it. I realised that that anxiety that keeps one awake at night is because your body, your soul is telling you that something is wrong. The minute I gave up on my M and focused on healing myself, it slowly stopped and has now gone away entirely.
I was never without fear as to whether or not i wanted her as a GF, whether I wanted to move in with her, get engaged, marry her, have a child with her - BUT now I am sure and without fear that I am making the best decision for me.
OH, and my e-divorce papers just came - I go to court tomorrow :-)
Just cos things are going right, doesn't mean that they were always wrong.
