I am going to break every DB rule in the books

[roist]

I understand not wanting to leave no stone unturned and also the desire to not leave things unsaid. And in the movies that often ends well. The approach here is general and may not apply fully toevery situation.Hence the concept of try, observe,adapt. Basically do what works and stop doing what isn't.

Rd mentioned the timescale and I have to agree. I would also add that if the DB techniques are working and W is thinking things over, a full declaration of love will most likely do two things
1. Send her running
2 she will know you are available as backup plan later just in case.
Both set you back.

I cannot say more without rereading your first thread and hearing more about your lives in the last year.

Going back to what cadet said earlier about letting go reminded me of something I heard recently when listening to advice on children. Basically a;; couple were having a hard time with their kids behaviour especially in external situations.A counselor told them to bring the kids to a restaurant with the intention of leaving if the children misbehaved. They kids behaved. Why because somehow they KNEW the parents meant it. That is the difference between feeling it and faking it. Many believe the WAS can pick up on our real level of attachment regardless of how we try to show the opposite.Is it possible your attachment showed through in your interactions over the last year.

For me the only utility of writing that letter is if you do so to say goodbye to your R and really move on afterwards.TThis is my opinion only.

I wish you all the best. Keep us posted please.