People are very much aware that your situation is sensitive and they don't know what to say or do, or even approach you because they know you are hurt and dealing w/a lot of pain right now. Your h, on the other hand, appears to be Mr. Social Butterfly and is acting all happy, etc., so they reach out to him w/questions. It's not that you have become a pariah, they don't know how to approach you since all of this mess went down. Have you reached out to any of them since your situation went south? If you didn't, that might have sent a red flag for them to step away and allow you time to find your footing. Also, about your h, you don't know what he's told them about the situation and how you are dealing w/it.
As for your h, he should have suggested that they give you a call rather than him responding to them questions, concerns, etc.
I am very sorry. In time, you'll begin to figure out who you can rely on and who will be there in your time of need. Once the dust settles, you'll most likely come across some of these people and they'll begin to open up about why they've not reached out to you. Sit quietly, the answers will come and I'm betting on your h being behind some of this distancing of friends and people that were in your life.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
