Chapter 2, She moved out - I win! I think

[bigybiz]

Zues16:

Thanks for your post - you hit lots of good points. The one thing that hit me that was not here but on a post you put on another thread. You told someone that how could they expect their W to give up the addiction to their A and/or OM if they could not give up their addiction to the W. That hit the right note for me.

My W is addicted to her new career, her community both in person and online. I fought it and fought it. Now, that's all she has. She see's her kids two evenings a week and on Saturday.

I'm still so focused on her. You all know, I've made massive changes. Everyone - I mean everyone has noticed them especially the W. I'm very happy with myself, very confident, my kids are great, I am thrilled with many of the tangible benefits. And I know if she never came back - I'd still be happy with the results so far.

So now I need to give up this "addiction" to her.

I try and "thought stop", I pray a lot, I am so busy with many many things. The question is - will she eventually fade to the background or is there something I can do that will facilitate this?

I think the prevailing wisdom is - once you are totally detached and not interested in her coming back - that's when she MAY come back.

So let's see what happens. I'll continue on my path and try and inject both new and old tactics.

Thanks Zues16