Quote: So what CeMar is looking for (and frankly, I am too), are examples of where the HD partner "changes themselves for the better," and then the LD/ND spouse is forced to make changes as a result.
I agree-- there are NO examples of this.
And CeMar is not looking for guarantees... he is looking for HOPE.
I believe a subtitle of this board could and should be: "abandon hope all ye who enter here."
One book I'm reading called Real Love says that nothing you do will change your partner until they are ready to change ON THEIR OWN (we knew that), so you basically have three choices:
1) live with it (the behavior) and hate it 2) live with and like it 3) leave.
BTW I'm not aware of any success stories where people just left and didn't come back because they don't need to. People do leave... but usually they come back because things aren't working. Julie33 may be an exception. Wish we knew what happened to Jenny!!
