My little slice of Life..

[sandi2]

Welcome aboard. Your story is very common, and it's good you found the DB board. Based on your W's attitude of disrespect, anger, etc., I suspect she has become wayward toward you and the MR. I believe the WW has a ton of resentment in her heart, and the feeling of disrespect begins to overflow into her actions. She blames her H for her lack of feelings for him. When she decides to leave the M, it is an act of rebellion. She is looking for greener pastures.

With the WAW, I believe there is more of a legitimate reason for her leaving. Maybe her H was abusive, refused to provide for his family, was into illegal practices, was an alcoholic or drug user, imprisoned, complete neglect, numberous adulerous affairs, etc. Her leaving is seen more as a means of survival......or else has lost all hope. Whereas, with a wayward wife, her leaving is an act of rebellion, and everything is based on her feelings. She may say she has given up on the H or M, but really, she's just done.

Usually, a WAW would not have a problem in being willing to work at saving the M, if the H will do what he is suppose to do and/or correct the things that drove her away. Whereas, the wayward wife is not willing to even try. The WAW may not want to end the M, but just doesn't know what else to do. The WW is intent on the H knowing it's over (regardless of her leaving or not) and her own selfishness is her motivation behind her actions.

I would think that it shouldn't be a complete shock to a sorry-a$$ed man to see his WAW slipping through his fingers. I have seen that whenever a WW drops the bomb on her H, he is usually shocked beyond words. No matter what he says or promises to do, the WW is not willing. Another significant distinction is that a WW almost always has an agenda to live the single's "lifestyle". Either by acting like Girls Gone Wild, jumping from one man to the other, or she already has eyes on a particular man. All of these type of behaviors are not the normal characteristic of the girl you married. It is as though she has totally turned into someone you no longer know. She may have been devoted to her spiritual beliefs. She might would have been eligible for the mother of the year award. None of that matters now. The WW will put their selfish wants before their own children. Keep your eyes open and see if these things start to surface.

Those are my opinion about the two. MWD does not separate them and lumps them together under WAW'S. After many years of studying this subject, and observing the board and others in life........I most definitely believe there are two types. I also believe the more wayward the W, the tougher the love the H needs to apply.

I have written several threads on the subject, if you are interested. It is listed on Cadet's post.

I encourage you to post every chance you get, read other posts, and especially read the links in Cadet's post.