What Should I be doing (5)

[Coconut]

RSG, it wasn't real close connected sex, it was filling a need. I did a lot of work to turn her on before she pulled me to her, I asked about her saying too soon, she told me she was referring to for her.


And cue anger... Ok, so today I've been feeling angry again... Mind wandering, wondering what was going on in her head, what could she have possibly be thinking to be talking to OM like that while she was cuddling with me at night, angry that she would text him good morning and night while laying in our marital bed... Grrr.

I have not let any of the anger out, I'm just processing my thoughts, allowing them to be heard and letting them go away. I keep thinking that I've forgiven her for the affair, but her thoughts behind her actions, her total disregard for me, was part of her A and it would seem as though I haven't forgiven for that... Oh well, I know I will feel better in time, and I will just deal with these thoughts as they come.

Now, as for piecing, I forget who says it all the time, but you definitely have to eat $hit sandwiches during the process. The other night when we ML, we were kissing and a thought goes through my mind (is she comparing my kisses to OM?), now I know that it would be a bad idea to bring up every thought that goes through my mind, so I had to eat it ($hit sandwhich). And there are plenty of other thoughts that come up when we are spending time together, some worth tabling until we have R talk, but most I just have to eat because they wouldn't do anything useful.