Had my weekly phone call with the kids earlier today and there was a brief moment where me and my W shared a joke and it felt like nothing had happened.
It made be feel incredibly lonely after and miss what we had but instead of wallowing I chucked some shoes on and went for a walk.
Had my weekly phone call with the kids earlier today and there was a brief moment where me and my W shared a joke and it felt like nothing had happened.
It made be feel incredibly lonely after and miss what we had but instead of wallowing I chucked some shoes on and went for a walk.
Fought the urge to reach out to my W today, I know it's a pointless endeavour and managed to tap in to the rational side of my brain.
I have been searching google just for information and I stumbled across an interesting article regarding apathy in marriage. The more I read the more it fit with my current sich.
It left me wondering if I am fighting a losing battle as it would appear it's very much something that both parties have to be involved in.
Out of interest is there ever any benefit to reaching out to your spouse to see if they would agree to spend time with you?
I'm thinking of trying to arrange a meet up in a couple of weeks to just be in each others company, no relationship talk, no funny business but just to see if that spark is still there.
Out of interest is there ever any benefit to reaching out to your spouse to see if they would agree to spend time with you?
I'm thinking of trying to arrange a meet up in a couple of weeks to just be in each others company, no relationship talk, no funny business but just to see if that spark is still there.
Kyle, it's a bad idea...
I know how much you want to be with her, to just laugh and pretend like everything is ok for an afternoon... I did it, I knew I shouldn't and it would have consequences, but I did it (I'm not proud). I actually think it had less of a negative effect in my case because I lived in the same house with my W anyway, so it wasn't like she would missed me if I was doing my own thing for those two hours.. But in your case, she really needs to miss you, and when she sees you, she needs to see somebody that she wants to call and see if you wanna hang out with her.
If you do it anyway, just be prepared for zero spark, if there was spark right now she'd be trying to move back in with you. You still have spark, it's her spark that needs to come back, and the more you Persue, the longer that will take.
M - 9 1/2 years 5/5/16 - Bomb drop - 3 week EA 10/31/16 - We sold house 01/10/18 - D Finalized
I thought that would be the general consensus but it was something I was seriously considering.
I can't help to feel that the missing should have happened by now, we've spent 8 years together and it's been 8 weeks since I left the house. The longer this goes on the more I feel I need to do something to influence the situation.
No a meet up, particularly without funny business, wouldn't be a good thing.
You need to GAL.
Lol... So just to clarify what darkness is saying, even a meetup with funny business is a bad idea, but at least you would get something out of that...
Think of it this way Kyle, your picturing the perfect meetup with her, your imagining she's gonna act a certain way, laugh at your jokes, tell you how much she misses being around you... Then you meetup and she's miserable, cold, and rude. She'll tell you if you weren't such a horrible H it would never of come to this.
Do you think you would be closer to your endgame? Do you think you would go home saying that your glad you met up? It's not gonna work like your imagining because it's not what she wants right now, wait until she wants to be with you, then you'll have your meetup (hopefully with funny business)..
You say it's been like 8 weeks, but you've only been DBing for like 1 or 2, before then you were pushing, don't push Kyle, DB, it's your best chance.
M - 9 1/2 years 5/5/16 - Bomb drop - 3 week EA 10/31/16 - We sold house 01/10/18 - D Finalized
