Did Not See It

[RDS]

Our sex life was DOA for years.
She had let herself go in the looks department (long story) and with my resentment towards her I just lost all desire for her.
My D told me a couple of times it hurt my W's feelings that I never wanted to make love to her, but I didn't care at the time.

So if you had a do over what would you do about the above?
This is all about her looks?
I am not buying that - sorry.


Are you working now?
I am unclear about what you wrote above?

No, sorry, it was not all about her looks, but she did let herself "go" somewhat. She did put on some pounds, but that never bothered me. I guess she started changing her hair color to what her friends liked more than what I liked, going to the tanning beds like an addiction, and really started dressing like a slob. It was more about comfort than how she looked. When she got a job recently she started dressing a lot better. I even complimented her.

And not to beat around the bush, I do have ED. I actually scheduled a doctor's appointment 2 weeks before the BD, but I wasn't seen until last week of may. I knew I had it but I resented my wife so much by then I didn't want sex anyway.

If I had to do it over again I would have went to the doctor to get the blue pill and worked with my wife on intimacy.

Yes, I do have a job. I got one right after I left my previous job. It doesn't pay as well and it's still stressful, but I had to leave my last job. I just had to.