On another topic - anyone got any good responses to the question "Where's W" when out at social events etc?
I used the excuse that was partly true, partly elaborated, but "her family is going through a hard time and she's been visiting with them a lot recently". I've also used her side job as an excuse in several occasions "she's picked up a lot of extra classes at the studio" or "she's trying to build/grow her side business so spending a lot of nights and weekends at the studio". Things like that...
It never feels comfortable to flat out LIE about what's going on. but honestly, its none of their business unless you want it to be. A simple, "she's with her mom" or "she's at work" or whatever is a simple, valid excuse, and anyone with a brain shouldn't really attempt to get much more out of you than that.
On your last session, did your coach go over the LRT in detail?
Not really, what I recall are:
A review of the previous 2 sessions Canned Response to what she says if she brings up S or D Suggestion to write an apology letter (which has been met with mixed reviews on here) - I wrote one but still have not given it to W And goals to work on
Me: 40 W: 45 T: 13, M: 11 1 D: 9
Suspect A 6/15 ILBINILWY 8/15, and 3/16 EA/PA Discovered 3/16 EA admitted 3/16 W Moved out 4/16 W opens R talk and says A over 1/17
[quote=PacLove] It never feels comfortable to flat out LIE about what's going on. but honestly, its none of their business unless you want it to be. A simple, "she's with her mom" or "she's at work" or whatever is a simple, valid excuse, and anyone with a brain shouldn't really attempt to get much more out of you than that.
Thanks - yeah all her family is halfway across the globe, so that won't fly. And a few of my friends work at the same company as her, so that may not work either especially on the weekends... I'll try and come up with something creative, maybe she's with friends or something...
Me: 40 W: 45 T: 13, M: 11 1 D: 9
Suspect A 6/15 ILBINILWY 8/15, and 3/16 EA/PA Discovered 3/16 EA admitted 3/16 W Moved out 4/16 W opens R talk and says A over 1/17
Not really, what I recall are: A review of the previous 2 sessions Canned Response to what she says if she brings up S or D Suggestion to write an apology letter (which has been met with mixed reviews on here) - I wrote one but still have not given it to W And goals to work on
Yeah, I think we started off at much different phases of our situation when dealing with coaches. I had already written my reconciliation/apology letter, and given it to her (it was basically ignored).
I have some time off the next few days, so I'm considering purchasing the MWD videos you posted... what's a $100 bucks for helping out the rest of my life, right?
Originally Posted By: PacLove
Thanks - yeah all her family is halfway across the globe, so that won't fly. And a few of my friends work at the same company as her, so that may not work either especially on the weekends... I'll try and come up with something creative, maybe she's with friends or something...
I will give you some advice about "lies" in general, keep it simple. you can use creativity to come up with something simple, but you don't want your free flowing artistic vibes splatting crazy lies everywhere. Remembedr, the less detail you give in your response, the less interested they'll be with remembering what you said, or asking follow up questions.
I think I learned that watching spy movies or something.
I actually spoke to "Reb" on the phone. He's literally a one man shop, and a retired pastor. Told me on the phone he receives hundreds of emails about letters and proofreading a day and said he just can't keep up with the workload.
PacLove, as long as you understand the message he's putting out there... Make it about her, her feelings, her hurt, her betrayal (by you) and how those things made her feel. Your fine. He didn't proof mine but I made damn sure it was spot on. Do not explain, do not justify, do not talk about how great things were/could be in only xyz changes. Only state the true message that you have "seen the light" and this has allowed you to understand your wrongdoings and how theyve hurt her so badly, you don't even need to say why you know, just that you now know.
This apology/reconciliation letter, should be the ultimate page and a half (ish) validation statement. In mine, I never even put the words (I'm sorry) in all the letter. If you write it properly, there's no need to, she'll get the meaning. You can always save the "I'm sorry" and the "will you please forgive me" conversations for face to face. Or perhaps follow up letter / card.
This apology/reconciliation letter, should be the ultimate page and a half (ish) validation statement. In mine, I never even put the words (I'm sorry) in all the letter. If you write it properly, there's no need to, she'll get the meaning. You can always save the "I'm sorry" and the "will you please forgive me" conversations for face to face. Or perhaps follow up letter / card.
This apology/reconciliation letter, should be the ultimate page and a half (ish) validation statement. In mine, I never even put the words (I'm sorry) in all the letter. If you write it properly, there's no need to, she'll get the meaning. You can always save the "I'm sorry" and the "will you please forgive me" conversations for face to face. Or perhaps follow up letter / card.
