Last thought...part of my doormat thing is that if I'm doing lots of things for you then I'm in control...'cuz you need me! If I don't do them then you might not need me anymore and therefore not love me. I also guilt myself "oh, it's not that big a deal, what kind kind of bf would let his gf take the bus while he sits on his arse at home doing nothing" etc. I also like caring for those I love...but let it get beyond reasonable sometimes. That line can get very blurred for me. Self care is hard ...may just be better to hang with my turtle lol. I don't know if any of that hits home with you but I'm just throwin' it out there.
