SH, I have lurked in your thread but have never posted because you seem to be coping so well.
Your post about evolution set me thinking. For a big part of my M, I was unhappy because the x didn't evolve. He wasn't ready for the responsibilities of M when we got M. He wasn't ready for the responsibilities of parenthood when I got pregnant. He just wasn't ready for this whole idea of being an adult as he had been (and still is) very well taken care of by his family. Prior to BD, I was either suffering from my own little MLC or was suffering from WAW symptoms as well. I was angry and hopeless and resentful.
Ironically, I started coming out of my own fog just before BD because I finally saw signs of evolution from the x. Tbh, the signs had been there for a while but I had been so angry and hopeless for so long that I didn't appreciate them for what they were.
Alas, the x decided to take his chances with the toilet paper because he too had been thinking that I wasn't evolved enough. So, the breakdown of my M is really a Tale of 2 unexpressed expectations/ unnoticed evolutions.
Sorry if I am rambling here but I guess the point I am trying to make is how do we deal with the issue of different evolution timelines.
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
