Hey my friend, I have been giving much thought, to our resent reconnection. I believe I know what it is. I believe that what breaks my heart about all this, I see so much of myself in you.
You are way smarter, more determined, focussed and motivated than I am, you understand the complex emotions and thoughts of others way better than I do and you have a brain that supports you to communicate yourself with simplicity without it being simple, and you are genuinely kind in how you post to others. I'm not any of these things. But in our emotional worlds however have many similarities. I believe I know why I found it so hard reading your posts.
There's only one another person I know who rejects love like you and that's me.
I think that's why I don't post very much on your thread's because love becomes an intellectual debate, and it isn't for me. I don't want the belief I hold about love being powerful and healing, and human connection between two loving adults (be it plantonic, romantic or sexual) being one of the greatest human experiences, I don't want that rejected by you.
I don't want my love and friendship of you rejected. I'm rejected because you fundamentally don't believe these are truths. It hurts.
It feels like your position on divorce his greater than love. So in other words how I interpret your position - Divorce is more important to you than ME. That your position on divorce is greater than you experiencing love.
(Crazy logic, but there you have it and I never said I wasn't crazy).
It seems the saddest thing in the world to me. for something that so painfully stopped you in your tracks, is ultimately the very thing that will stop you from having love in your life, having good people like me in your life.
You've let divorce win. And that kind sir breaks my heart.
This post was about two pages Zues. But I don't know it's value to you or to me.
So I guess there you have it. We sit in two opposite positions. Please know I fully aware of what the above comment says about my own psyche. There's a fair amount of projection in there. But Zues there is also some truth.
