What Should I be doing (4)

[roist]

From what I read most of the issues that caused you to react /feel that way are to do with you, not W. This is tough, no doubt. I think you couldn't cope with how you felt more so than how your W behaviour. So to not have to deal with those feelings (anxiety, stress, distrust, anger, betrayal.....) you took yourself out of the situation.

It is one solution and often appears the best/only way to cope. But a better way is to remove those feelings from the situation. It is not easy and may take time, but it can be done.

I don't see your situation as hopeless even now. Wait. The ball is in her court. She will not have liked your publicising the messages, so initially you may only get reaction to that. BUT she cannot hide her intentions anymore. If she still moves towards reconciliation that speaks for itself.

I say this to give an outsiders view and by no means to judge.

Best wishes