Sunny Days are Here, Again

[Zues126]

Hey Sunny. Hope the weather is beautiful on your porch and the coffee is rich.

It's all on a spectrum. You say 'it's a text', and that is true. A text is just a text. Multiple texts daily throughout the day and night, or texts joking that are a little too personal are another.

Where's the line? That seems to be the question you are asking.

For me, I don't want to know where the line is. I have no desire to find out what the line is, because I'd prefer to be nowhere close to it.

It's like my self-test for alcoholism, or other addictions. How do you know when you have a problem? My answer has always been "when you have to ask yourself". I drink 1-3 beers 2-4 times annually, and then it's spaced out over time. There is no doubt in my mind I'm not an alcoholic. If I drank 1-2 beers a night 5-6 days a week, and liked to get loose every weekend, but didn't black out, or have 'consequences', maybe I'm across the line, maybe not, but in my mind once I start having to wonder I've gone too far.

So my answer would be if your relationships with your male acquaintances are laid back, friendly, and they are so far from anything serious, emotional, or personal that the idea seems absurd...great, no issues. If you shoot someone a text to see if they're bringing something to a get together, or you send them a funny picture that reminds you of a conversation you had at the last social event you saw them at, fine, no worries. If you have an ongoing conversation with them (like the one we're having on this forum) and you're sharing that conversation with your spouse, I don't see the harm. This is about as far as I think it should go so it doesn't come anywhere near the line.

As for what you do when you're single, I don't have strong opinions, but for me I would personally stay away from that line and only get closer if I thought we were both exploring relationship opportunity.