It changes YOU and that is how it works. Basically you get more of what you put your focus on. It only takes one to change the dynamics in a R. Our W's have proven that! , In an R, we are clouded by our negative thoughts. We are sad, we are resentful, we are angry. This affects our behavior and interactions. Imagine if we felt only love and gratitude. Automatically our thinking and ultimately our demeanor will radiate that. I would bet your negative feelings about what you are enduring show through. This could help break that cycle.This is not about ozing love and appreciation on your W but using those emotions to feel better. Achieve that and you show a better you, which can do no harm.
I have over simplified the concept and yes I have doubts too, but being a happier person and showing that to the world can only be positive. I do believe in the power of appreciation/gratitude and how it can help PMA .
Worst case scenario you try for a month and review. If it does not help, you can cross it off the list of things you tried. For me it is important to be able to look my sons in the eye and say I tried everything.I don't feel I have tried everything so I keep going.
To counter everything I just said I know that I can not rebuild my M unless my W comes on board and nothing I do can force that to happen. But maybe the work I am doing on me will tempt her. Regardless I like the new me better and better. And anything that helps PMA, happiness etc can only be beneficial even if only for me.
R 25 years M 14 years S11 & S13 Working on it alone since Oct 2014 M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years) Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr. Next R chat Aug'17 Still together
