On a scary note... The current scuttlebutt circulating about Mr. Fantastic's GF is that she's sending her 19 & 17 yo sons to buy pot for her... I asked D13 if she had noticed anything out of place at his house and she commented on the GF's mascara on his pillowcase, clothes in his closet, toothbrush in his bathroom*, but said that was all. I heard the gossip from a neighbor whose teen babysitter goes to school w/the 17yo. (The GF has three younger children as well.)
Thoughts?
*D13 also mentioned that the GF has been using my D's shampoo. D was annoyed and determined this by marking the shampoo level on the side of the bottle with eyeliner. She did this repeatedly till an additional bottle of shampoo turned up in the shower... Given how challenging I find my girl, and she LOVES me, I can only imagine the enjoyment she's offering the GF.
Me42, H40 D12, S8, S7 A revealed: 7/13 Sep 4/14; Agreed to D 1/15
You know, it's possible that whatever the teenage babysitter heard about OW's son is a lie - other told by another teen, or by the 17 year old to cover his butt ("Oh no, this pot's not for me, my mom needs it for her insomnia").
If you talk to anyone about it, I would talk to your ex and just let him know you are not ok with it in the house with D13.
It wouldn't be a concern for me. Why is it "scary"? The US president smoked pot, Canada is about to make it legal and it already is in many countries, etc. Teenagers will all be exposed to pot and socially pressured into trying it. I know I have. Then I moved on. You can't prevent it by stopping GF.
By the way, your conversation will start with "Hey, I heard from the neighbor who's babysitter goes to school with D17 who told her..." It will not sound very convincing, nor hard to dismiss.
You'll need to have the drug conversation with your D13 sooner or later, regardless of whether you will be hardline or not, and this might be an opportunity. Or you can wait. But you can't stop GF from doing anything by speaking to no-good Mr Fantastic. It's just another opportunity to show him how powerless you are.
M39 D6 D3 (at S) S 2014-09 D 2016-09
"You can't start a fire sitting around, crying over a broken heart" - Bruce Springsteen.
Just me I would give d tools to handle the pot and ignore xh and his gf.
Not once in xh2 presence have I ever mentioned his ow now gf and he goes to great lengths to hide her even now she is I suspect living there most of the time.
I pretend she doesn't exist and I know he really hates that as he wants me to pick fights and be focused on her not him. Easier for me no kids etc.
But the whole social grace knowing what when where how we all get it wrong. Coffee breath ain't that bad and there are far worse things in the world.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26