14 days of sheer hell, part 7

[DDJ]

@darknes, my WW argues that she's only going out because I am GAL'ing. She only put a lock on her phone because i did it.
Every attempt to drop her, financially, physically and emotionally is seen by her as another way that i'm punishing her and pushing her away. For her, its a game, for me, i'm trying to deal with myself.

I believe that I am giving up control of her - I am giving her all the space that she wants. I need to avoid her because she is in relations with other men. How can i possibly let her in, whilst letting her go? I'm still dealing with my feelings or lack of that i introspected today, I have no time for her cos i'm focusing on me, but will validate, as a minimum.

As for D, i appreciate your pro-marriage stance. I really do. I know that D is not the answer here, but it is the right thing to do. My stance of being a bachelor has changed, I need to be selfless. My feelings say don't let go, my head says that she has broken the cardinal sin of M, for which there is only one consequence. I am hurting thinking about the finality, but i believe that this is where my journey is taking me.

I will look at the goals again with your feedback too. Thank you as always. Don't give up on me just yet.