WAS or what (recap for me)

[roist]

Post by cadet 6 may 15

Originally Posted By: roiste
Communication.
Before communication was not my best point. Being mire communicative us surely a good 180 for me. And it is one of my major goals as per the steps in DR. I have eased back esp texts since being on the forum. I believe this is imp in our R and am not sure how to proceed. Any tips advice or comments are welcome.

I am not sure that practicing your 180 on her is a great idea.
You can try and measure the results, yet sometimes the sound of our voice can be seen as pressure or pursuit.
Originally Posted By: roiste
Asking:
I am trying to use a beginners mind and not assume stuff, but I have the feeling that my wife is not receptive to being asked for what I want in our R. Maybe I should try something small and judge the reaction. Do ye advise to let sleeping dogs lye for the moment?

This is again pursuing and relationship talk is not a good idea.
Originally Posted By: roiste

I am someone who always bottled up emotions esp negative ones. I never explode with anger. My wife has even given out to me in the past for never showing anger. I have shown it but more as a bad mood than an outburst. Now to not put negativity into the mix at home I am bottling up my emotions again. I read in DR of a guy who exploded angrily with wife and it was different for him and it was the start of them getting their R back on track. I thought recently about whether that could be worth thinking about in my case. The context would need to be right and definetely not anger in reaction to her. Any thoughts on this?

You know her better than anyone else.
Anger possibly as something that shows
your manly qualities as a protector.
I would think anything directed at her would not work.