Sunny, I married my first real boyfriend who I started dating when I was 18 or 19! I began dating in my late 20's, divorced, with a baby. It was honestly so difficult and draining I chose not to date for quite sometime. I was just trying to survive some of the time, other times, I think I enjoyed being single, and just having my baby to worry about. But a woman has needs! And that includes emotional needs. I guess as life calmed down a bit, I realized how much I missed having someone to come home to. I am not liking my empty bed as I once did. But starting from scratch over and over is tiring.
I turn 36 on Friday. Each year that another birthday comes and I am still single stings a bit. Giving the definite "no" when asked if I plan on having anymore kids makes me sad a little, but I do not plan to have anymore.Ex NG's daughter gave me the capcity to know I can love someone elses child very much. I realize at this age I am craving that security and comfort I have never known from a man. I let myself envision stability and a home and a family with exNG (even if he was all over the place and it wasn't real). I am now pretty hungry for it. But I have to give it up to the universe.
That's the opposite of living in the moment, isn't it Barb? LOL! I do think about the future often. But even if we have the stability, nothing is guaranteed, and I do know that.
Sorry, I am getting more thoughtful as my birthday approaches.Happens every year. But also very grateful. 2 years ago I was just laid off from a job a this time. I am now gainfully employed.
Oh, here I will end with this. my BFF and I brought our daugters to dinner with another friend tonight. we were in the car and I said something and D8 said " Mommy likes a boy!" I said " I like lots of boys!" She then says "well, why don't you ever get any, then?"
