Job, that's a great idea with the money! Except I almost never use cash, so I barely get change anymore:( Although I think I can devise a plan to get a few bucks in there a week.
I look forward to the date, hopefully we could make it work. I never get into the details of exH early on. I answer what is asked, and usually someone wants a little bit of a background, and what is important to me is that a date knows I did not cheat on my ex or leave him. With the time, the rest of the details come as they want to know. I never find myself comparing to ex's either, but I definitely keep my eyes wide open to red flags. I have zero expectations, but trying to remain positive.
Barb, the widow thing is uncharted territory for me and I had a little freak out over it yesterday. I googled him to do my proper research, and his W's obit came up. I had a mini panic attack about coming in after the beloved mother, wife, and daughter in law. My friend calmed me down about it, so I will shake it from my head. But I found him quite easily as he told me his high up position at a local catholic high school. He's legit.
Can I be brutally honest here? I do not plan on introducing D8 until I am honestly confident it is going anywhere with any guy. He would feel the same about his young kids too, I'm sure. Of course, he is truly a single parent and making time to date is super difficult for him. It's not so easy for me either. Dating is bad enough. Dating after divorce is bad enough. Dating at my age with young kids is like a strategical, complicated mission. I want long term, I want a partner in life. But sometimes I wonder if that hope is better left for when D8 is around 16/17 and in the meantime I go out, maybe find myself a special "friend" with no commitment. I am not kidding. I kind of had it and I blew it with feelings and stuff(not talking about ex NG) If I knew how to keep feelings on a certain level, and not let it get past there, this would honestly be the most ideal situation for me.
You are right, Barb, I really have no clue what is right is right for me. I'm just putting it out into the universe and what is right will find me.
