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I get what you mean. I am a fixer too and I was like, what do you mean I can't fix xh? (As you can see from the use of 'xh', I really couldn't fix him. But then I came to this site only after I was D)

Natus, make use of your drive to fix things to fix yourself. When you're in a position of strength and not fear, you can see things so much better, and not be swayed by your emotions. And that is when you have the best fighting chance for your M.

P.S. I sincerely believe that Dbing is also for saving Ms too, but like what we all say here, save yourself first.


You can call me Dory/ Grl.

As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"

It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
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I'm trying to make small achievable goals to work towards. I'm a best man at a wedding this weekend so I'm going to put all my effort into being the best best man I can be. I'm trying to remember that this day isn't about me and my problems.

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I'm trying to make small achievable goals to work towards. I'm a best man at a wedding this weekend so I'm going to put all my effort into being the best best man I can be. I'm trying to remember that this day isn't about me and my problems.

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Originally Posted By: KyleR
I'm trying to make small achievable goals to work towards. I'm a best man at a wedding this weekend so I'm going to put all my effort into being the best best man I can be. I'm trying to remember that this day isn't about me and my problems.


This, this is wonderful!


Me: 48, XH: 42
T: 18 years, M: 15 years

EA/PA 1: 6/2012
EA/PA 2: from autumn 2012-present

BD: 5/2013
ILYBNILWY BD & left: 10/2015

OW conceived: 8/2016
Born: 4/2017

H filed: 7/2017
D final: 28/12/2017
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Thank you. I must admit this is a day I've been dreading for weeks but I'm now of the opinion that I'm not going to let my W actions ruin someone else's big day.

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Originally Posted By: KyleR
Thank you. I must admit this is a day I've been dreading for weeks but I'm now of the opinion that I'm not going to let my W actions ruin someone else's big day.


That's a great start. A fun night can really be the beginning of a plan for you. It'll show you that the work you put in for that night CAN be learned and repeated.


Me: 35 W: 32
S: 4
T: 6 M: 4
Physical Separation official: 5/21
Currently: DR/DBing, Focusing on me and son

Cheating on a good person is like throwing away a diamond and picking up a rock.
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I am so sorry. It should be Kyler, not Natus. Holes in my brains. Need to fix them soon.


You can call me Dory/ Grl.

As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"

It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
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I've learnt today that my wife is struggling financially and it breaks my heart to think of her and my kids going without. I've already sent her £300 last week but her wages just don't cover the outgoings in the house. I have no idea what to do!

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I've learnt today that my wife is struggling financially and it breaks my heart to think of her and my kids going without. I've already sent her £300 last week but her wages just don't cover the outgoings in the house. I have no idea what to do!

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Originally Posted By: KyleR
I have no idea what to do!

Why do you need to do anything?

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