Greetings from the other side. I am well. I don't have a lot to say. I wake up each morning with the understanding that I will be parting ways with my wife, that we shall follow different paths. I have grown accustomed to the idea, I don't like it but I choose to accept it. This acceptance has made the in house separation easier. I have a general plan for the future and will fine tune it in the next 2 years while my son is completing high school.
It gets easier if you stop grasping and wanting. Each day you make the best choices to effect change and accept what reality offers. I love my wife and choose to behave with kindness and compassion while surrendering to her desire of divorce. If this is what she wants I will not stand in her way. I will start a new chapter of my life and will fill it with joy and beauty. I choose to live well. I will post from time to time as milestones occur. I wake up each day and enjoy the life I've built, savoring it, knowing the impermanence of all that surrounds us.
Good to hear from you. When you are ready can you share some of the logistics of your situation? When will ye separate? Who is moving? When is your daughter home?
Later i'd love to hear more about that two year plan.
Best wishes.
R 25 years M 14 years S11 & S13 Working on it alone since Oct 2014 M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years) Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr. Next R chat Aug'17 Still together
R 25 years M 14 years S11 & S13 Working on it alone since Oct 2014 M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years) Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr. Next R chat Aug'17 Still together
Hi everyone, I'm still alive and kicking. I will try to post more often. It seems like forever since my last post but it has only been two weeks. I was on here all the time for 15 months and now I haven't looked once, for two whole weeks. I think the break was necessary. I was experiencing DB burnout. Feeling good again and will be here more often.
Nothing has changed here in regards to my marriage or the lack there of. I am polite and considerate but my thoughts are about me and what is important to me in the future. So I spend my time with my kids and planning my next steps. I have two years till my son graduates high school so I don't have to make hard choices just yet.
Be well my friends, I will come by your threads in the near future and say hello, until then, be well
The thing that bothers me most about my wife wanting the divorce is her treatment of me. She ignores me, will not speak to me unless she has something to say, will not look at me unless she is talking. After 30 years and 3 children I am treated like a bum on the street corner.
I understand she wants a divorce, I accept it but must I be treated like a piece of human debris. The intelligent sophisticated woman I married is acting in a rude immature manner. It could be worse I suppose.
As I live in the twilight of my marriage I see more clearly the state of my strengths and weaknesses. I will strive to get my emotional house in order. Working on my psychological and physical issues will reap a better emotional state of well being.
That's where I am and what I'm doing. I am not bitter. Actually, I have hope for a happy future, a different one then I wanted but a happy one. Be well
The thing that bothers me most about my wife wanting the divorce is her treatment of me. She ignores me, will not speak to me unless she has something to say, will not look at me unless she is talking. After 30 years and 3 children I am treated like a bum on the street corner.
I understand she wants a divorce, I accept it but must I be treated like a piece of human debris. The intelligent sophisticated woman I married is acting in a rude immature manner. It could be worse I suppose.
As I live in the twilight of my marriage I see more clearly the state of my strengths and weaknesses. I will strive to get my emotional house in order. Working on my psychological and physical issues will reap a better emotional state of well being.
That's where I am and what I'm doing. I am not bitter. Actually, I have hope for a happy future, a different one then I wanted but a happy one. Be well
What makes you think that the divorce is about YOU? Or anything that YOU did?
My guess is this is more about her and you are a casualty of war. My own opinion is that they live to regret it but only after you are long gone.
