Unfortunately this is one of my bigger fears... What will I do with my kids? Doing some of the activities with the kids will be extremely difficult without her, unless I find someone else to replace her, either friends or a girlfriend.
There is a tremendous amount of activites you csn do with your kids one on one. I spent nearly 3 years basically doing stuff with my boys without wife. she just was not present for them. it is a learning curve, sure but I've found that some of thier favorite memories over last 5 years was just dad being there...not just there really, bit actually present and engaging.
it is my wife's loss that she didn't or couldn't be involved like i did. I have pity for her for that. she broke down last spring...I remeber it, she said how it has been so long and ashe felt so terrible for not being able to be as involved with them. she told me how lucky she was and children are for being such a tremendous father. she could not lie to herself about that despite all of my other 'faults'.
THAT is something you control. being a goidfather figure to them, that nothing your wife or MIL could ever say to them, would hold any sway because they know the truth because you are there for theme when they are with you. period. you control your actions. the kids see it. they absorb all that we do, the learn and grow as a result.
seriously, you can make a list of activites to do with them, even sit down and ask thier input once they see some examples they will come up with more I'm sure.
when I get some time this week, if you want I can give you examples...at work now and lunch will be spent getting license renewals for cars.
you are soooooo on a good path here, i can feel it!
