First of all it is a process, you're not where you will be in 90 days or 365 days, but you get there by striving little by little.
Second, it doesn't really matter if you 'backslide' in front of her, because when you truly don't care what she thinks about you then you stop caring if she sees you're still conflicted. This isn't a game anymore. It's a man that's filing a divorce he didn't want, but has to pursue. Of course you're going to show the same regret as a man taking his sick dog to the vet. Who cares?
Third, there is no reason you couldn't play it off if you wanted. Like "I thought we had a lot of logistical things to discuss", and "While I'm not interested in a close friendship, I do want to proceed with mutual goodwill and be effective coparents", that kind of thing. No reason you have to act like you are trying to date her.
Just my initial thoughts. Don't sweat it. You'll get where you're going.
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
