What Should I be doing (4)

[sandi2]

Coconut, you are on the verge of being a WAH. I have seen this happen with the LBH'S and LBW'S. It is the hurt and disappointment turning into apathy.

The main issue I'm having to work through is a girl who recently started working in my office. She's worked for my company for awhile, I only met her once before about 6 months ago, and she was flirting with me then, but I shut that down quick because it wasn't somewhere I woulda even considered going, but with all of this happening, now I find myself thinking about her. It's crazy, she's like 15 years younger than me, shes smokin hot and I know it's the wrong thing to be Thinking about, but I can't help myself from wondering.

Again, this is not uncommon. This new girl at work is nothing more but ego salve. She is a boost to your male ego that's been badly bruised. She gives you ideas about moving on with a new relation and experiencing the rush of new, hot passion. Guess what? I had all those thought when I became involved with the OM! I just could not muster the interest or energy to put into a dead MR. I think that's where you are standing right now.
FWIW, I don't think your MR is dead!

Listen, I see a lot of positive reactions from your W. And if I recall (I may have my stories mixed up) you had become a little less than energetic in your sex life before you knew she was giving her attention to OM. So now, you still experience some leftover feelings of rejection, b/c she is not eager to jump into sex with you.

I think your expectations are too high, considering how soon it has been since she said she would do what you asked. In my eyes, she is putting forth much more effort than a lot of WW's do. Your high expectations can unknowingly put pressure on her. Try your best not to put her under a magnifying glass while at the BBQ. Don't hover over her, but don't ignore her, either. At least pretend you are relaxed and enjoying yourself.

How is her attitude when the two of you are interacting?