The hardest part for me sometimes is the feeling I screwed up my chance at saving this M last year when this all started. When she first had these thoughts for someone else but says she chose me. I did so many things wrong since I was going through my own crisis at the time. I somthered her and fought with her when I didn't feel she was doing the things she said she would. Her actions were not meeting her words. Neither of us did the work on ourselves that we needed to do, it was always my problem and I was the one that needed fixing, not her. Rather than get stronger, I was crashing in my own crisis.
