continued detachment, anxiety, and joys of limbo

[Sotto]

Phoebe Sweetie, I am sorry to hear that and of course you must feel so upset. I recall the day I received draft D papers via email. I came home from work and cried and cried. RD on this forum kindly sat and had a glass of wine with me that evening, which I shall never forget. I didn't tell anyone else until the following days. But I did find that after 24 hours I was able to regroup a little and keep moving forward.

Try not to worry about any pre-meditation and it was the bank holiday weekend and so on. Just focus on working through the grief and there is plenty of time to seek advice and respond rather than react.

I would like to say that in general (and with the parts you can control) you are doing really well, and I think you are right where you need to be at this point in time. If he has chosen to file for D, that's on him and something you don't get to control. However, you do get to choose how you respond.

I'm a little further down the road than you and my H did see things right through to D. In a way (didn't realise this until some time had passed) it helped me that he has filed as I didn't need to make that decision myself after a long period of limbo. Others in the MLC part of the forum have longish sitches and H's that haven't filed and it is a tough decision to have to make.

Hope your Mum has arrived and will look after you. Keep posting and know that we are all here to help xx