Chapter 2, She moved out - I win! I think

[bigybiz]

PacLove:

Thanks for the your post. The overall message with these WAW/WW is they need to feel the loss that they instigated. So until she walks into that 2 X 4 on her own - she won't feel it.

I still have a burning feeling inside me to "show her" how "together" I am with the house, kids, etc. I know that it's the wrong motivation - but as I keep saying there is a triple benefit if the kids, the house, etc are well cared for - they are happy, I'll be happy knowing that yes I can do it all and if it bugs her - that would be great too. She doubts my ability to run the house. Well, not only am I running it - I'm improving it.

Or if she thinks - that we don't miss/need her and she distances herself even more - then that's telling to.

As I said over and over. I'm very happy with all the small consistent changes I've been making. It definitely shows a trajectory and I know I'm reaping the benefits.

I've decided I'll go dark on posting what I'm doing with the kids etc. If she wants to know - she will ask and/or she can see when she comes over.

I will change the house in moderation. I'll keep up the improvements and the decluttering. I won't toss her stuff and I won't make drastic changes i.e. take down photos of her, change paint colours, etc.