RSG, this is a tough but critical time, it's time for you to give space, validate, and keep working on yourself. It sounds like you already know this and your taking steps to take it one day at a time. I really don't even know what to suggest because it seems like your on the right track.
The only thing I can think of is you may want to take a class, or read a book, on anger management and/or communicating. These will help you in the long run, but for now don't communicate, just validate. Be a great dad and focus on yourself, it's a long road and you need to start with yourself.
M - 9 1/2 years 5/5/16 - Bomb drop - 3 week EA 10/31/16 - We sold house 01/10/18 - D Finalized