Chapter 2, She moved out - I win! I think

[bigybiz]

SadHub:

Thanks for your post. There is no question I am suffering from extensive confusion. I really like the practical/physical. It gives me a real sense of accomplishment which makes me feel great and boosts my confidence. I love giving the impression to everyone that I'm busy, focused, achieving, etc. Sometimes I even believe it.

I've accomplish so much since the fall of 2015 - it's almost scary and yes it tick's the W off which I kinda enjoy. There are two moments that I savour.

1) She said - Why are you doing all these house projects now - how come you did not do them when it could have made a difference.

2) On Saturday before she left she said: Your work outs are paying off you look very defined.

As you point out - It seems that I have been doing them for her as much as I have been doing them for me.

So for now I'll claim to be the winner:

I have my house, my 3 kids, a fab body, a motorcycle, new skills (cooking, etc) - so I should be attractive to someone.

Now I need to set the boundaries and keep her from ruining my progress.

Here is the catch. I believe God brought us together. We both messed it up (I'll take much of the blame). And now I need to trust that God has a plan for me that will give my more than I could possibly imagine. So I won't date.

So in the meantime - my mind is my worst enemy. I need to figure out how to detach - without developing a hard heart like hers.

Even if she does not come back, etc, etc. I'll still be very happy with the progress I've made.

How does that sound?