I started last week, and he instantly pursued me. Then I asked questions about the OW relationship and our relationship. Nothing dramatic, but it got my hopes up.
Then it blew into a HUGE confrontation with him and OW. Then I went dark. Interestingly enough, months ago a big confrontation would have infuriated him, and he would have been happy that I went dark.
This time I can see it scaring him. I politely reply to his messages, but I initiate nothing. I will not be asking anything about OW or our relationship. I set myself up for hurt and pain when I do.
I continue working on me and working on GAL. I continue responding with very polite responses, as I know he needs the contact, but I will not pursue, reason, beg, ask questions, or worry.
It is good for him to have to do the work, and it is good for him to wonder what I am doing, etc. It is also good for me to not be invested in trying to win him back by doing everything for him or with him in mind.
We may never reconcile, and I need to live my life with that in mind, and better myself with that in mind.
