Lost and scared

[Coconut]

It's ok JZ, you messed up, just start again... Have you started thinking about things you can do away from the house? Nothing wrong with sitting on the porch, I love doing so, but it will help you when your not wondering if your H is going to come find you... Last night I heard about a open mic night at a local British Pub, it was great.. I had never been to anything like it, but found myself enjoying the musicians and comics..

I've always struggled with initiating small talk, so I've never gone to bars alone, but I sat at the bar last night and forced myself to initiate conversation... The point is I saw something I "thought" might be fun, and I went for it... Tonight I'm going for a second meditation class, something I never thought would interest me, but I found that I really loved it last class, and it took away sooo much stress.

They don't need to be big things, just find new things to try, it will build your self confidence and may even give you a smile. Go on meetup.com right now, see what's going on in your area this week and pick something to do.