It's an insane aspect to understand no doubt. Ideally she needed someone that could stop her from continuing her inwardly wayward ways before they exploded outwards. Not a chance that I could have been that guy back then, was not strong enough. Getting stronger everyday.
Thats the other thing tho cbtdad, i'm not trying to push my WW away. Im trying to focus on myself. Nothing at all to save my M, or even a R. Nothing at all. What must be will be. I'm pushing her out of the house so that I can be alone for the first time in my life. But I'm not pushing her out of my life or head.
I need to find myself as much as she does. Get my life in order, rebuild and then see what happens. By giving up on her, i'm not giving up on my M, i'm saying that I have no control, i'm giving her the space to find herself. And for me to find myself too.
Just cos things are going right, doesn't mean that they were always wrong.
