Thank you for responding; it's nice to hear from someone in a similar situation.
My wife's "friend" is an older man who'd had some experiences with childhood abuse that was similar to what my wife had experienced. I thought it was a good thing that my wife had someone she could talk to that had been through some of the stuff she survived. I thought of him as a sort-of fatherly figure to my wife (they're about 15 years apart in age). But, I became very uncomfortable when their interactions seemed to become all-consuming. I'm fairly certain it wasn't a PA, but the MC confirmed that it was (or is) an EA.
The thing that made it hardest for me was that my wife's friend's wife is also friends with my wife (whew, sounds complicated). It's almost as if she promotes the two of them having more time together. It seems really weird to me that his wife would push them together, but she does. (My wife doesn't look her age, she looks 30 years younger than her friend).
Anyway, there's no question that the friendship became inappropriate (she's willing to divorce me to keep him), but I never understood why his wife is such a proponent of the two of them having more time together including alone time together. I think that's just a tad weird, but I can't understand it and probably never will.
