Building my life...

[mahhhty]

Wow Wonka. I've listened to some Marshall Rosenburg. Interesting concept in nonviolent communication. And you are right I had no idea who he was. He focuses on identifying human needs and identifying what needs are not being met. I'm still listening to more of his talks right now. I have been playing the game of who is right for a very long time. I have a lot to learn. Thank you for pointing him out.

In this situation about school... As a parent I have a need to provide the best I can, and I do understand that this school is better. I think my needs are to understand the stability of the arrangement, and how the day to day process would work.

I believe her need is to provide the best education she can for her kids. I do believe their is a host of selfish reasons behind this (this is a judgement), but I try not to focus on but I do.

NEW RESPONSE...
We obviously have a disagreement here. We have an equal say in the choice of schools as we have joint custody. If you want to take this to a legal route - you are free to pursue that along with the time and expense - However I am willing to continue to try and work this out with you in the best interests of the children. We won't be able to I'd like to have a goal of collaborating together in a nonviolent way as an alternative to litigating every disagreements. I believe this would have a positive impact on our children.

The school is better. Here is what I suggest. I'm concerned about what the plan is when you are not able to pick up the kids, since I will be farther away and unable to to assist as often. If we proceed with this new school, I will want a formal plan in place about what will happen regarding drop offs and pick ups when they are with you and you have a scheduling conflict. I believe this may be an appropriate time to review the parenting plan schedule we have been operating outside the schedule for a long time with regards to Fridays. I am willing to collaborate on a new plan for pick up and drop offs to implement into the parenting plan.

Also as their father, I would like to know who will be living with my children. I'm sure you will appreciate the same consideration when my living circumstances change.

----End of response... Thoughts?

I see now how I have attempted to control more pieces than I understood. I believe I have many feelings that I attribute to her which is incorrect. I know I am responsible for my own feelings.

I believe I have the following feelings, that I need to understand what needs are not being met.
- I have anger that she does not follow the parenting plan on every other Friday.
- I have anger/I am hurt because there has been no conversation about the OM, which I think is incorrect.
- I have a concern that her life will not change as the number of activities the children are involved in changes.