W did an OFP to protect herself from her own weakness? Because she really wanted out? Like, permanently? Even though she showed NO signs 2 weeks earlier? Ironic, just read another thread by Martin5, about how fast they seem to change.
I'm feeling a little better about myself, but I still feel stuck. I can't "show" DB'ing. I know, I know, DB'ing is supposed to be for me, not W, but leaves me in a position of not being able to do anything to try to repair this mess. As long as this OFP is in place, there is NO hope, only a continuous stream of money pouring out the door, and a semi continuous stream of tears. As long as it is in place, or at least until the D is finalized, I am having a hell of a time with GAL.
Here's the part of DB'ing I'm not getting: People on here have a spouse that betrays them, in one way or another, different for every sitch. The LBS has to do all the work? Just doesn't seem right! It's like accepting blame that we pushed them away, and we have to justify all of their rotten behavior to boot.
On the other side of the argument, sure I wasn't perfect, sure W had a 6 ring circus just packed with crazy monkeys. But it still doesn't justify the actions she is taking. Does it?
The first couple replies from people more emotionally stable than myself (or at least come across that way in their posts, LOL), like Zephyr, SadHub (SH now?), V, Cadet, JOB, etc... Stating things about how I didn't deserve the way I am being treated makes me feel better about me, doesn't make me feel better about W. But I have to find it in myself to forgive and take the high road? And still try to maintain some hope that she will realize her mistake? After the devastation she left in her wake both emotionally and financially? I don't know, I just don't see ever recovering from that with or without her. I'm scared that I will end up one of those people bitter and alone for the rest of their life!
Also from Martin5's thread:
Originally Posted By: Cadet
If you really want to learn there is much information that can be gathered here. Although most people will take my word for it, some need this information to keep moving forward. I know I did.
Knowledge is Power!
Yep, I need to know. But I don't know that it is possible to get the answers without talking to W?
