Talking about weird Japanese films. There was one that really resonated with me. It was about a woman who after discovering her h's A, realised that she could change into a chair at will. And she spent the rest of her life hiding in another man's house in the guise of a chair when the man was around.
A weird version of the x men?
Pole dancing... maybe I should get put a pole in the study in my new place
Or maybe you could become a pole in some man's house.