I agree with RD. Many WAS are so entrenched in their belief that the LBS is at fault, unchanging and unlovable that they cannot see/accept what everyone else sees.

The good news is that most WAS eventually do realize what they should have known all along.

I have no real advice just my support. I understand where you are at and I share those feelings. People have turned things around in far worse situations.

As you don't need to post very often nowadays I assume you are fairly alright. That is good. On the limited postings since ye moved out, I wonder if you could maybe pull back further.

Best wishes


R 25 years
M 14 years
S11 & S13
Working on it alone since Oct 2014
M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years)
Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr.
Next R chat Aug'17
Still together