Destruction - 1

[speeder]

I can't believe I'm going through this again! In a small way I blame the home we moved into. At the last place our computers were just feet apart in the same room, and we would spend evening surfing and chatting together, but since buying this house on Dec. she has an office/jewelry studio upstairs with a door and I have my desk down in the living room. A similar situation to how it was in the old home and BD#1. I find a bored and left alone woman can really get into trouble.

I do not have the DB/DR book yet but in the meantime I have been pouring over this. The simple idea of it being nobody wants to divorce someone on their side. Someone who uses empathy and agrees with them. Who engages in non-threatening small talk to imply no conflict in the ability to talk. It's all about reverse psychology and as I like to say "Chances are very good in winning a race when your opponent doesn't know you're racing." In this case the underlying jujitsu.

Don't defend yourself, learn to shut-up and walk away. (Advice I certainly need to follow as once again last night I was corned into a relationship talk, which ended badly. It all started out as happy talk). I feel as if I'm performing far better than with the first BD and OM, but this situation is entirely a different beast. I'm hoping the BF can have some effect on her side.

Eats me up inside to know W pursues this affair with OM and there's really nothing I can do about it. I've thought of having one of my sons friends (who lives in IL) set nails behind his tires to dampen next weekends overnight trip with my W. ARGH!