I can see how juggling the two lives for her would seem attractive, but it's hard to imagine that would be a long-term goal for happiness. More than "finding a way to have both", I would view view the 'outside friends and events' as more of an escape mechanism. Not saying that's any better, but it's probably no different than endulging in online video games, drugs, drinking, etc. People escape in different ways, but in the end, those 'escapes' grow old and if she's not also working on herself for her REAL life concerns, it'll only come back to bite everyone on the arse later.
