I'm pretty lucky, because he knows I've been reading nonstop for months, and now suddenly I'm changing. He won't know that it is a specific technique that has me changing. He just knows I'm fed up, and that I'm moving on.
Last night he popped in to see the kids, and while he was there said "Last night when I couldn't get hold of you I didn't even know what to do. I couldn't sleep. I was waking up constantly to see if you had responded. It's like you've always been there, and I didn't know what to do when you weren't"
I just sat quietly, and didn't say anything. I'm not being cold or rude when he is there; just distant.
Fifteen minutes after he got home he was facetiming me to say goodnight. Again, I answered it, and responded very lightly to him, but didn't initiate any conversation.
I absolutely love the Lighthouse story that someone has posted here. I've changed the lock screen on my phone to a light house, and I just consistently remind myself that I am doing this so I can have a better life, and if I am eventually a beacon of light that guides him home then we'll cross that bridge later. In the meantime, I will work on me.
