Too little too late?

[CRW]

Why not? Why was "getting ice cream" a better choice?
Your kids are very young. Do you expect to be meeting for some kind of social event every time they change hands?

NO, I just don't want the kids to feel like they are luggage being passed back and forth.

This is going to be a VERY long road if you arent able to separate your children's wellbeing from your relationship. Theres some things that you dont need to communicate about - what S ate during the day, whether W forgot a pair of pants, whether S slept well, etc. Those kinds of "check-ins" are pursuing. But when your kid is having surgery, then you need to be able to talk civilly.

How can you be the model of how to communicate in these instances?

SO, how do I handle it when she is asking my all of those mundane details about the kids? Ignore it?

I dont think you did any "damage" with the exchange. But if you know you should have ignored it, then why didnt you?

I might have encouraged her "good behavior" instead of joking around. "Glad to hear it. Thanks for being there for him today." and left it at that.

That is great advice, thanks.